I will never forget when I was told our oldest had ADHD. My heart stopped. That was why he constantly needed to be moving, felt things so strongly that it was hard to express them, and it was also why he and I constantly struggled with each other. Sitting there listening to what all this meant, the ways to lessen the stress on him and how this would mean that life had to change, I remember feeling just so overwhelmed.
Fast forward 2 years later and we had another amazing son who also exhibited all the signs of his older brother, only with even more intensity. For our family, we chose not to medicate (to each there own on this one) and so as their mom, I had to discover peace in the midst of this ADHD diagnosis. Because as a mom of four, in our home, you either learn fast or hide in a bathroom with the door locked.
For my children and myself, I knew that I must find some sort of peace amidst the constant surprises that a child with ADHD has. After all, as a mother, I want nothing but the best for my children and at the end of the day, peace is what we all need. Here are a few things I learned.
4 Ways to Discover Peace in the Midst of ADHD
- Do not take things personally: Seriously ADHD has highs and lows. The high moments can be really high and the low moments can reach beyond low. This isn’t something that we ourselves can take personally. When you have ADHD you can’t regulate your emotions and really, not many children can anyway. Instead, we have to learn to say to ourselves, this isn’t meant for us. Instead, it is meant for this particular situation and I just happen to be the one there at the time. This allows us to stay somewhat calm and composed.
- Routine is key: A person with ADHD has to have a routine. It needs to flow and it needs to be followed as much a humanly possible. Yes, it is hard, but that routine helps someone with ADHD function because they know what is happening next and they know what to expect. They need this and so do you. Going away from the routine is an over-stimulation that can lead to the land of crazy.
- Learn when to take a time-out: Time-outs to cool down are important for both you and the child. Sometimes you both need a moment to truly understand what has caused the issue and what you both can do next time. Taking a time-out allows you both to have a minute to be able to come back together to also have very awesome and meaningful conversations.
- Take a moment to step back and really watch them so you can see their beauty: I know some of the days are hard but take a moment to truly see what you have. You have a child who thinks outside the box, who can love without borders and who can truly grasp things that fascinates them in ways some people can only dream about. Your ADHD child should be celebrated, so find their beauty.
Taking Charge of ADHD, The Complete, Authoritative Guide for ParentsSmart but Scattered: The RevolutionaryParenting Children with ADHD: 10 Lessons That Medicine Cannot TeachRaising Boys with ADHD: Secrets for Parenting Healthy, Happy SonsMindful Parenting for ADHD: A Guide to Cultivating Calm, Reducing Stress, and Helping Children ThriveDriven to Distraction (Revised): Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit DisorderLearning To Slow Down & Pay Attention: A Book for Kids About ADHDThe ADHD Book of Lists: A Practical Guide for Helping Children and Teens with Attention Deficit DisordersParenting ADHD Now!Smart but Scattered Teens
Parenting an ADHD child can be hard. However, the rewards can be so amazing. Personally, I wouldn’t trade this journey for the world, because if nothing else, my motherhood journey is interesting and full of twists and turns.
Until Next Time Just Keep Soaring 4 Him,
Latest posts by Bridget Childress (see all)
- Moms of Large Families: Staying Connected with Each Child - June 11, 2018
- Losing Yourself in Motherhood - April 9, 2018
- Encouraging Joy, Even on the Hardest Days - March 19, 2018